withsomejam

Where do I start? Well, it’s clear I’ve had a bit of a hiatus. A break from this little corner of the internet while i processed… a lot of loss. The break wasn’t so much a decision but rather something that just happened.

So what’s happened?

Well, last year was a rocky road. Losing both grandfathers, as well as a few close family friends, meant we were in a constant reel of funerals and reuniting with friends and loved ones but for all the wrong reasons. 2023 was the year of losing everything i knew.

We fell into routines, some healthier than others in hindsight. We pushed ourselves to get so much done and in the process, did certain disservices to ourselves. We fell apart in so many ways but we also managed to find moments of levity within the grief.

While my grief is very much ongoing, and I still struggle daily, I’ve made a few adjustments this year and feel it’s the right time to return here.

Last year, we got to visit Manchester -albeit not for as long as we had planned. We weren’t attending a wedding and had plans to stay longer to have some time just for James and I. Instead, we both fell terribly ill, decided to come home early, and now we look back at the trip with a tinge of bittersweetness. We did have chance to visit a few cool things and hidden gems so I will be sharing those here soon. We do intend on going back at some point, as there’s so much we didn’t get to do however, I think we both need a bit more time to forget just how ill we were the last time.

I had a great birthday -James took me to see The Phantom of the Opera which was his first theatre musical and he loved it. It was so dreamy!

We had a wonderful Halloween and a different Christmas to usual. Of course it was a tricky one but I also found myself wanting to adapt our traditions a bit, which I’m hoping to do for Christmas 2024.

We have had a lot of changes so far this year: mainly that James has moved in! With rising prices and life just becoming so hectic, he decided to finally take up my parents offer and move in with us. I’ve had mixed responses to this, some are thrilled while others hate the idea, but as I look back now I think it was the best decision for us. While we weren’t facing any problems in our relationship, we also weren’t getting to spend any time together, which I think over a prolonged amount of time could have caused issues; so I think it was ultimately the best decision.

We spent our January, and much of February too, getting James settled into the house and just ultimately, finding some form of a routine.

Since then we’ve had a few other things going on within the family. Health problems springing up and getting the beach hut set up for the season ahead. Last year was so manic that we didn’t get chance to enjoy it. This year, I’m hoping to enjoy some days down there and just unwind.

And of course, a great thing so far this year has been our trip to Edinburgh! We visited at the end of march for James’s birthday and had the best time. I have already been writing posts for this. We crammed in a lot in the time we were there and I have so much I want to share so stay tuned for that!

Ultimately this year, I want to try to find a better balance between everything. Throughout 2023, it was so easy to find myself getting overwhelmed or exhausted from doing everything to support everyone else. This year I want to make a real point of becoming better at pacing myself and balancing everything out in a healthier way… she says. I’m hopeful though and I’m excited for everything to come.

Cheerio for now!