The weather has always had an effect on me -not in a bad way, but rather a thought-provoking way. As I listen to the Summer rain cascading down my window, I can’t help but let my mind wander from this to that. I never started this space with anything in particular in mind to share. This is not a space devoted to beauty or travel (although those things do appear from time to time), but rather just the written word in general. And so, I find myself typing away: jotting down my idle musings. Perhaps these words shall never be read, which is quite alright.
For the past three years now, I have been in an area -more so a full on arena- of discomfort. When I say discomfort, I mean physical unrest; and I mean this within the realm of my physical habitat.
Now I know, I have mentioned my living situation more than once on here -but it’s really difficult to not talk about something when it effects you in such an evident way.
With my bedroom being on the ground floor, and not being insulated at all, I have found myself in a cycle of floods and damage from rainwater which have felt never-ending at times. Just as I would find a new way to cope with this dishevelled way of living another curveball would be hit my way and another pair of Birkenstocks would be ruined from the dirt and grit that the flow of rainwater brought into my make-shift bedroom.
I don’t want to sound like this is a p!ssed off rant because quite honestly it isn’t. It’s merely a sigh of relief as I throw my hands in the air and let go of all expectations for what’s to come. I think the more expectations you have the more let down you become in the long run; and my mental health just doesn’t need that.
Instead, I’m starting to fall into the new routine of finding comforts in my discomfort. I have started to find comfort in the small pleasures and little things which give me that smile and spark of joy in my heart. Things like a new book, a heavenly scented candle and even an early night (yup, I’m getting old).
I don’t know when this period of unrest will end but i’m okay with the idea of ‘not being okay’; and for now, I think that’s good enough.